Kia’s Answers

Kia!

Ok so I met a lovely young man one night at a lovely young club call East. Turns out we have loads in common - we hit it off - all is right with the world UNTIL three days later I get the txt msgs from him.. He is being nice, friendly, pretending he cares what I got up to on the weekend and such however when suggesting we catch up in the future he says “It’s complicated for me right now, I’ll be in touch xo” Soooo why would he even txt me in the first place and what not if he doesnt really have any intention of catching up?  What does “it’s complicated for me right now” even mean? Argh!

THANK YOU in advance for any insight you may have on the subject

Kat xoxox, 20

Dear Kat,

I have a few theories, none of which bode well because if a man is single, his jewels are in working order, he has a lot in common with you and thinks there may be more than a 1% chance he could get laid, then he usually can’t see a damn complicated thing about it!

Above all, I think it’s most likely he’s in a relationship already.  His saying he’ll be in touch bodes well in that he may be in the processes of working up the courage to think about maybe getting around to breaking up with that someone someday soon.  So at least he let you know that it’s complicated rather than you becoming that unknowing other woman.  Don’t hold your breath but don’t delete his number either.

Or maybe he fell off his motorbike recently and has a scab all down one side of his body and can’t see you until he’s all healed and beautiful again.

Or maybe he can’t catch up with you in case he’d like to invite you to go back to his place and he still lives with his mum and sleeps in a bed shaped like a racing car so he’s trying to buy a new double bed but all the doors are tiny so it’s really complicated to try to saw the bed into pieces and weld it back together inside his room cause all the sparks keep making his carpet catch fire.

It’s possible that maybe he’s just figuring out he’s gay but he’s hoping like anything that he’s actually bisexual cause he likes you so much so once he figures it out then he’ll be in touch with you.  Fingers crossed he’s more of a doughnut guy than a hotdog man!

In seriousness, I don’t think it’s that he’s not into you cause he def seems keen with the texting and asking you how you are.  On the flip-side though, he could have no intention of ever leaving his potential gf but loves flirting and connecting with you, enjoys your attention and the excitement so he could just be using you and might continue to drive you mad with his vague rebuffs until you get tired of him.

If you plan to play it cool hereon in maybe text once a month or something to let him know you’re still there and keen and also so he keeps thinking of you.   However, if he texts all the time but won’t even catch up as “friends” don’t let yourself become his little mobile instant gratification bitch - you deserve better.  As soon as you’re fed up with his antics should they continue then you should stop there, admit to yourself that this is probably going nowhere and it’s time to tell him to jam his phone up his arse, buy yourself a  new dress and hit the clubs again!

xo Kia